Some of us want to accumulate money because we simply can’t stop ourselves.

To those thus inclined, money is like Pokémon cards or Civil War relics or anything else a person might hoard. And because accumulation feels good, triggering biological reward responses that would have nudged our proto-human ancestors into gathering resources (the better to survive and procreate), some of us keep accumulating money, hitting that ‘get more’ button over and over and over again until we die.

For many of us, though, money actually represents freedom. Or safety. Or the leverage required to accomplish some long-cherished goal. Sometimes the money itself is the point, but sometimes it’s more about what the money symbolizes: the gaps it fills in our lives.

Working out can be similar.

Some people exercise because of the physical and psychological rewards inherent in the act of straining their muscles and circulatory systems. But for others, going to the gym or for a run is a means of staying alive long enough to see their children grow up, or to remain fit enough to continue enjoying long hikes through the wilderness with their partner.

For some people, romantic relationships represent stability. For others it’s love. For still others it represents a certain type of accomplishment or life milestone.

Having kids, investing in our careers, cultivating hobbies, writing books, competing in marathons—all have overt meanings, but also deeper, more specific and personal meanings.

Almost always, our actual reasons for raising children or writing a book will be far more complex than the cursory explanations for these undertakings. In some cases, those default rationales will be just a small part of a larger portfolio of reasons, and in others they’ll be completely orthogonal to our true, us-shaped motives.

Whatever the nature of our ambitions, it’s useful to understand them with as much granularity as possible. Such understanding can help us to aim for ultra-specific aspects of our goals, rather than superficial, iconographic versions of them that kinda sorta look like what we have in mind, but which in practice miss the point entirely.

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